God's son returns?

Did you hear this rumor yet!!!!

The one where Timothy Richard Tebow broke up Lindsey Vonn's marriage and is now dating her?

That's right. A rumor that the should-have-been-aborted-miracle-baby, born-again Christian, Filipino circumcising, saving-himself-for-marriage, inaccurate as all hell, starting Bronco's QB has landed super hot US Olympian Alpine goddess Lindsey Vonn.

Some guys have all the luck.

If this is somehow true (it's not, if there is a fair and loving God, this is not true), then the debate is over. Tebow is the second-coming of Christ, and this time he's decided "You know what, I'm Jesus fucking Christ! Sure, I'll prepare the army of the Lord for judgement day in 2012, but I'll be damned if I don't get to have a little fun along the way this time around!"

Screw it. As discussed here previously, Julia Mancuso is my favorite hot US winter Olympian anyway. (Nastia Liukin gets the summer and overall titles).

If hating Tim Tebow means I'm rooting against Jesus...

... then let's go Satan!

And I don't mean Miroslav. (Though this was gorgeous. I can't get enough of the NHL Playoffs!!)

This is what The Denver Post is reporting that Tebow said of his first meeting with Bronco's head coach Josh McDaniels:

"I was jacked leaving that room. I didn't even want to visit another room. It was not enough time," Tebow said. "We were excited, we were enthusiastic. There was passion. It was just intense, and it was ball, and it was juice. The juice level in that room was high, and it was awesome."

You'll notice the typical born-again Christian vernacular right off the bat: "jacked", "it was ball," "it was juice." Are these not things right out of Scott Stapp's uber-douchey mouth?!?

I hope this guy breaks his femur on the first day of practice, and if that puts me at odds with the good Lord, then so be it. The God I pray to can't possibly like Tim Tebow.